“This is the real secret of life — to be completely engaged with what you are doing in the here and now. And instead of calling it work, realize it is play.” ― Alan W. Watts
This was my first week in the studio in over two years!
It wasn’t as productive as I would have hoped for, but I really enjoyed being back ‘at it’.
Something that I’ve learned about myself via my own experience as well as through Human Design, is that I am the most creative when working alone.
Many years ago, when I was grappling with the idea of what to do creatively, I was suffering from intense anxiety.
I was at a crossroads in my life…I had a job that paid very well, but it was not satisfying at all. I felt a pull towards something, but was frustrated because I didn’t know where the pull was coming from, nor what it was compelling me to do.
When we were still living in Oregon, I was walking downtown in Springfield on my lunch break, and happened upon a jeweler who was working at his bench. I could see him through the window of his shop, and something just clicked. That’s what I want to do. That is my IT!
What was it that I reacted to so strongly?
He was alone and immersed in his creativity to the exclusion of everyone else. I could see him…observe his process…but he was so immersed I was invisible to him.
As children, if we had a decent childhood, we natively understood play. Playing is often a solitary activity that allows for complete immersion in the here and now. It’s the closest I’ve really ever come to understanding true communion with the source of where I believe I came from.
Play is the doorway to enter into the space where one’s purpose can be found.
When my anxiety was so debilitating, I went to see a therapist. After about 5 sessions, she told me something that has stuck with me and that I’ve shared with those that are interested in arresting their own anxiety about this idea of purpose.
She said, “When you don’t have to do anything, like housework or other life responsibilities, observe where you tend to spend the most of your time and follow that. Do more of that…that will lead you to your purpose.”
After that session, I never went back.
Anxiety is our mind reacting to fear about the future. When you are immersed in the present, you teach your mind to stay where it belongs…right here, right now.
So go play…and see where it leads!